Non-Negotiables of Parenting
Teaching Your Kids to Respect Others
Joey and Carla Link
September 4, 2024
We have been talking about the non-negotiables of parenting, meaning what we think every parent should train their kids to do, without question. We spent two blogs on obedience. Today we are talking about another non-negotiable and that is to teach your kids respect for people who have important roles in their lives.
So, what is respect? It is an appreciation for someone because of their abilities, talents, rights or traditions. “Rights” would be someone or something who has an important role of authority in your kids’ life, like a teacher or coach. They hold positions that demand respect.
“Talents” would be something they do really well, almost without trying. For Joey, he has wonderful hand-eye coordination, meaning he is really good at any game that uses a racquet or bat. I started playing piano when I was 4 yrs. old. I had an innate ability to feel the music as I played any song. When I played for competitions, that is what every judge would say in their comments. Kids should be taught to appreciate and show value to their siblings and friends who have talents, either innate or that they worked for that make them better than most their age.
Our kids are adults now, and when they come to our house for Christmas, they let us know we didn’t have to do some things that we considered traditions. We finally told them that these traditions were important to us and we weren’t trying to make them important to them, but we would appreciate it if they would respect why they were important to us if we still chose to do them.
Being respectful always starts with parents and siblings. Family first. Everyone knows Ephesians 6:1 – “Children obey your parents in the Lord.” What about Ephesians 6:2? “Honor your father and mother.”
Honor means to show respect. Respect reflects one’s attitude. How do you teach your kids to show you and others honor?
Don’t
- Don’t allow them to speak to you or their siblings in a hostile or sarcastic tone.
- Don’t allow them to use body language such as crossing their arms, looking the other way, or putting their hands on their hips when listening to you.
- Don’t allow them to talk back or be rude to you or their siblings.
DO
- Do let them ask for clarification.
- Do know the younger kids will follow their older siblings’ example.
- Do show your kids the respect they have earned.
Do you know your kids won’t listen to you or others if they don’t respect you or them? One way your kids can show respect to adults is to call them Mr. or Mrs. This is especially true of seniors. If they don’t show respect to their siblings, privately ask each of your kids 5 years and up to give you one way they can consistently be nice to their brothers and sisters. Write them down and hold them accountable for working on this.
“Paul says, ‘Be devoted to one another in love.
Honor one another above yourselves’.”
Romans 12:10
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